Is this a dream or is this a dream>????????!!>? speaking of dreams...

Ladies and gentlemen we are on schedule!
I'm so proud.
It's the little things that count :D

In the topic of being on time, I actully wrote the 'title' for this post yesterday. So writing my blog right now... I have no idea what the title is about.
Oh!
I think I was talking about how its a dream that I posted on time...?
Yeah.
That must be it.

And speaking of dreams! I'm on my periodddddddddddd~!
How is this relevant you ask? Well, it usually drains my energy on the first day and makes me feel sick and tired, so I ended up taking a nap. Its usually lasts for an hour or more, and I hate these afternoon naps. Because what happens is that I wake up confused, unaware of time and space, wandering how time I've lost, what happened and where everybody is. The first thing I always do when it happens is always call out for someone. Yesterday when I woke I called out for my mum, totally confused and scared. That's the thing about these naps. It rejuvenates me but it makes me feel worried, confused, lonely and scared. So after wandering around my house calling after my mum, I settled down and did whatever I did yesterday.
Is it just me that gets this? This, confusion?
hmm

Another note worthy thing is that I found some nicely priced Legend of Zelda Ocarina of time 3ds games on amazon and I am desperate for them. With Papa in china, the economy is different in money value and I'm praying like crazy that he buys it for me. I've already begged for it on kakao and after making my clear statement of 'If you don't buy it, I won't love you anymore. I'll hate you.", he agreed to buy it. After that I told him I loved him with shit loads of emoticons.
See that? That's how you get what you want. you give them the stick then the carrot. In my case, harass, threaten, then compliment. Throw the plate and the cutlery before you throw the cake.
Actually, I threw the cupcakes first, and when that didn't work, I did the other stuff.

Threats are the best, especially if the other person values what you threaten.
And that's all for today!
Other than cutting my finger while cutting onions and wasting my time on the city because some bullshit people and feeling shit about my 'art', there really is nothing to report on with my silly excuse for a life.
merrrrp
man who really reads my shit?

What is life. Life is nothing if you live like me

There I go again, being late for an update in my sorry excuse for a life.
Imagine, if I cant even weekly update a blog that has no word limit nor certain aspects to be accomplished in order for me to be assessed and achieved, how the heck am I supposed to survive in University?

I guess I better just shove my nose on a plate and die.
It's a korean phrase Don't worry about it.

Now what is there in my life that is worth noting? hmm...
Well, besides this crippling fear that I'm not doing anything with my time worthwhile, not much I guess.

So let's talk about things that we all have in common as human beings; The fear that nothing is worth nothing.
Reading it, of course it makes sense. Nothing will of course equivilate to nothing. (Oh and yes, I am aware that equivilate is not something you will find in the dictionary, nor is it an available word on scrabble. But I believe people should not be afraid to expand on words and creating new ones to express a thought further. But that's another topic to cover.) Nothing will mean nothing as the Dictionary would also state. But when one believes they are doing nothing, well, everything about them and their actions seem... The same. Nothing. and it leaves you feeling sore and empty.

It sucks when that thought hits you like a train carrying logs and building materials out of nowhere. You're there, maybe doing your homework, watching entertainment, playing games, or drawing, and the thought smacks you so hard you might as well be shitting a tonne of bricks with a stoic face.
I know my sentence doesn't make any sense but hear me out. I find expressing my thoughts difficult with proper grammar, not because its so emotional, but because I'm shit at grammar.

The struggles of being a gap year student for me is feeling like nothing. I made all these grand promises to accomplish so much, but its already September and I'm constantly given a reminder of how I'm an utter failure by my daily routine of wake up late, have brunch, draw and watch youtube, 3hrs outside doing tutoring, back, eat, defecate, wash, games, sleep.
It's the same process again and again and again and the days blur together to the point I ask if its friday or sunday. I can't tell.

I have little to none social life and when I do find the chance to talk to my friends I'm over the top because geez hey, I'm excited! I'm like that caveman who hasn't seen a fire before.

Gap year is great if you have money, ambition, courage, and social life. If you don't have any of them, you end up as a slob like me, slowly gathering money to use for University while taking a shit in the same corner.

Speaking of university, I'm scared shitless that I wont get in.

The creation of a blog

They say the best way to start off anything is always best with some toilet humour, but since I can't think of any, I guess I'm off to a bad start.

Living in New Zealand is excellent. We have all the finest comforts, such as the lack of insulation in many homes, high prices of homes, the inability for many people to buy homes; basically living in a house is darn expensive.

The education is great here. We have little knowledge of the history of many other countries other than ours, and we all know the history of New Zealand is a great conversation starter when speaking to the rest of the world. If an American started a conversation about his patriotic nation, in all honesty I would be enraptured.

I hope my sarcasm is clearly shown dripping all over the words, except for the american history part, I would love a conversation regarding that.

I feel like I'm going off in a tangent. What am I even talking about. I guess this is the basic taste of the format of all my blogs. A stream of thoughts that go through my head uninterrupted. Great, no one's going to read my s**t.

I guess the best way to finish is informing you - you somehow reading this - and by you I mean I don't know, whoever is reading this I guess? - of why I started a blog.

Well, if you're going to struggle about the minutiae things, its best to share with others, right?

Welp that's it, have a lovely day everyone.

Oh and my sister asked me what year it was. I should have said it was 2002 or something.